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How to Partner With Your Life

When you instantly think of the word, life, many things such as the game called Life, children’s faces or even a sunrise or sunset come to mind. When we ponder on the word, life, we then begin to view moments of interruptions, such as an unwanted pregnancy after calling the baby factor quits; perhaps the economic downfall gave way to this thing called fear and it has paralyzed the way you visualize success; or perhaps, a loved one has left your side…leaving you with grief and interrupted.

You know that feeling, don’t you? The disgust and overwhelming frustration that washes over you when you are derailed off of your chosen agenda. If you are like me, then you probably planned one thing for your lives, and yet your current situation looks nothing like what you had in mind. Someone tampered with our ambitions, goals, and dreams. You could say, the yellow-brick road of our lives veered off into some unexpected direction.

Who wouldn’t want to avoid this? 

Yet a closer look reveals an issue of value. When we deem our current task as an essential priority, we’ll look with contempt on anything that threatens our time focused on it. Why? You see, we’ve given priority and credited value to the current task, person or goal. Meaning… we are sometimes too defined by the ink on paper and meaningful thoughts or the idea of a vision. 

Interruptions only become positive when we consider the person or the circumstance interrupting to be more significant than that which currently occupies our attention. It is easy to say that life’s most Ultimate plans are our most essential endeavors. But it takes hard work to partner with your life and rework your view of You. Yet, to handle life’s interruptions appropriately, you need a fresh view of You.  

Next week we will touch on a man whose life was interrupted but, his interrupted life became a significant life. You see, after his interruption, his story [like many prior to him] became a legacy for others, including the life of our CEO/Founder, Hardeep Melamed.

Concluding today’s message, in your journal or agenda, write the top three aspirations at this point in your life. It could be a goal you have for your children, your career, finances or something else. Then take time to ponder on whether you place more importance on them or on life’s purposes for you. Will you yield them to a Greater Power if that is requested of you?

Painting by Paul Chelko.

Written by Mavian Arocha-Rowe — September 19, 2012

Are You Double-Minded?



Do you want to succeed yet doubt your ability to pave a path or walk on an already established road? Can you follow through without shanking out? Oh and did you know this mindset is dangerous because it prevents you from being you? 

Double-mindedness sounds very Hollywood, but did you know the Bible warns against being double-minded? In fact, in his New Testament letter, the apostle James uses the term double-minded twice. So what is this thing called double-mindedness, and what are its consequences? 

For starters, the Greek word translated “double-minded” is dipsuchos, from dis, meaning “twice,” and psuche, meaning “mind.” It is used to describe someone who is divided in his interests or loyalties, wavering, uncertain, two-faced, half-hearted. Being double-minded is a sure problem that can damage anyone and can manifest itself in several areas of their lives; and surely, whether he smiles or not, no one wants a double-minded employee. 

An area of double-mindedness leads a person to be dubious and indecisive in all his ways. Doubt and irresoluteness in our commitments short-circuit our relationship with others. Before asking anyone for anything, or acting on our desire to succeed we should first ask ourselves questions that directly bear on our mind and position. Such as, what do I really want; is my attitude in life in tune with me, myself, and I; are my motives self-centered or do I understand that servant leadership is rewarding and authentically satisfying, regardless of the job position?

Double-mindedness can creep into our attitude. It can steal who “you” are meant to become. We should go beyond just feeling good to actually striving to be good in all we do. A pleasant, satisfied feeling can deceive us into thinking we have accomplished something when we haven't.

Let’s say you asked for the business cards or contact details of some new contacts. The next week, follow up with an email or phone call; if you get voicemail, leave a message (don’t hang up after the third ring). You have to keep the relationship alive; otherwise, you haven’t really networked at all, nor are you following through. 

If you discussed a particular topic with your new friend, perhaps you could research some more and send them an interesting article or point out a new blog on the subject.

Be practical: Follow up with a note on their social networking page or a private email. Why not, let the person know you are interested in exchanging ideas on the topic, and offer them some interesting points for discussion? Wouldn’t a friend do that?

Take every thought “captive” because it is critical. You see, our thoughts are the first to be triggered in the chain-reaction of our actions. In other words, our thoughts stir up our emotions; our emotions then influence our choices; and, our choices are what produce our lives. Thus, whatever controls our thinking will ultimately be what controls our lives.

Our minds are not just our thoughts or our reason or our intellect, but a whole conceptual process. 

The fact that the battle of our every step really is waged in our minds is pretty incredible. We’re either going to be single-minded, to motivate and direct all our actions; or, double-minded, blocking the true solution of your equation. Which are you? And as always, remember, beauty starts within. 

Photography by Savaza.

Written by Mavian Arocha-Rowe — August 17, 2012

Choose to Smile


So what makes you smile? What makes you feel validated? It could be cheesy 80s clip or an ultra-cheesy short film, such as Kurt Kuenne's Validation, which by the way, has packed the awards in more than thirteen film festivals with its very unique narrative. For us, it could be an array of things, such as looking at someone until they smile, and that could take a long time; reminding ourselves of the last time we embarrassed ourselves; or perhaps being in a very uncomfortable situation and not knowing what else to do, but smile.

For many, an uncomfortable situation can be networking. The fear-factor surrounding networking can perhaps be the word “networking” itself. Instead of trying to “network,” let’s redefine it with: Meet a new friend. Let’s think of the upcoming industry event or question on Twitter as an opportunity to help someone. When you solve someone’s problem or point him or her toward a useful resource, all in a friendly manner, you’re actually networking.

A good way to meeting people and one trick shy people can utilize most effectively: be a listener. Most people want to download their problem (or several problems) and they are very happy to unload that problem onto whoever seems the most receptive. Did you know most people don’t want to be told they’re wrong, or have a discussion about their problem? Often, they simply want someone to listen.

Let’s be practical: At the beginning of a networking event or an online discussion, give yourself a mini-challenge. Say to yourself “By the time I leave, two people will have asked me for my business card,” or “Before dessert is served, I will have met someone who unloaded their marketing and branding problems onto me.”

Try to push the boundaries of your comfort zone so you can reach out to people you might normally avoid. If you attend an event with a friend or colleague, perhaps you could give each other a mini-challenge. Adding this competitive aspect can give you added courage to talk to people.

The key to networking is giving. Give information, give advice, give your services, and give your personality, and you will be well on your way to forging lasting business relationships.

Let’s envision networking as something that is not difficult. If you are a genuine, interesting, and honest person, eventually, others will see that too. After all, we all have something great and exclusive that no one else has. Your job is to unveil that greatness. Once you watch the short film Validation you will understand… Favor for your friend? After you watch the film, verbally repeat these words: I am great. And, don’t forget to smile… And remember, beauty starts within. 

Photography by Savaza.

Written by Mavian Arocha-Rowe — August 17, 2012

Where Are Our Brains Headed Today and What Is Our Destiny?

The overall body of knowledge doubles every year. No person can be a true know-it-all. There’s just too much to know. What is happening in today’s world is very subtle: younger people are demanding more intelligence from their interactions. Whether the interaction is with a computer, an automobile, a cellular phone or another human being, consumers want engagement.

So, new marketing tactics and the new media are engaging. But what’s happening in regards to our personal engagements, our person-to-person interactions? Do we lose something when we are interacting with gadgets or does new technology bring people together? Absolutely, Androds, iPhones, and the Internet have made the world a smaller place. It’s easier and cheaper to send video, still images, text, and voice than ever before. With webcams and small digital video cameras, people run the risk of making inappropriate personal disclosures and invading each other’s privacy. Ironically, making polite conversation with someone in an elevator becomes awkward because it’s easier and more efficient to send them a text message.

Yet, individuals have the power to control the flow of program and advertising/social media content in the new media. This control over the volume of information is where we find Einstein. Did you know Albert Einstein spent much of his time in solitude? He had the power to shut out distractions and work out his theories with the latitude to make his mind a playground with solitude and music.

According to Kenji Sugimoto, Einstein understood passion and love. Love is the most powerful creative force. Robert Fritz, author of The Path of Least Resistance, wrote about an ongoing debate he had with the local Catholic priest while Fritz was studying at the Boston Conservatory. The debate was about creationism versus evolution. The priest told Fritz that God created the world because God loved it enough to make it exist. Although Fritz was agnostic, he recognized the power of love as the creative force because he was creating music. Robert Fritz had to love the music enough to create it. Einstein loved to spar with fellow scientist Niels Bohr about their respective theories. He loved the theories enough to thrash them out with reasoning—one mode of loving them into existence.

As we engage technology and—hopefully—each other, we can become part of the user-driven tide of marketing and interpersonal communication. The new media platforms can help us control the volume of inputs, so we can decide as individuals what, where and how to engage. We can have the time and space to allow our minds to play with ideas and thrash out new concepts—to reflect on old concepts in some solitude and to choose our passions. Remember, beauty starts within. 

Photography by Savaza.

Written by Mavian Arocha-Rowe — August 17, 2012

Thinking, A Lot

Have you sometimes been in the mood to simply watch a movie and relax? Truly relax? No thinking, involved? We all have wanted that; some more than others. Yet, despite how much you tell your brain to not think, it has a mind of its own. For example, the other day, I switched my thinking bulb off. Dr. Bronner’s almond shower gel and OnDemand were high on my priority list. I selected, "Why I Wore Lipstick," after scanning through its description. Frankly, all I read was, young journalist—click, this movie has just been selected. When the intro credits began to play, I saw the title of the movie, and the words: "To my Mastectomy," pop-up. Surely this kept my interest as many women today fear the haunting words: breast cancer. 

Remember, I gave myself permission to relax and not think; and I actually followed through.  Instead, the next morning, I woke up with the thought: How do you keep inspired at work while facing struggles like a cancer or even a divorce or loss of aging parents? How can employers uplift their team when one or two players are absent on mind? And isn't it the best interest of the employer to uplift its wounded soldier? Thankfully at PurseN matters of the heart are top priorities. However, how do these issues stand in your workplace?

Although I stopped watching the movie because my mind was drifting to dreamlandia, I did learn why the main character, Geralyn Lucas, who by the way is the actual breast cancer survivor who wrote the script and book, decided to wear red lipstick during her surgery. For her, like most women, red describes complete content confidence. For many, we seek the day to dare to be red, yet quickly remove the color red for mauve or pink lip gloss. Instead, breast cancer made her brave and red became her new “it” color to flaunt.

We leave you with the following: What is your design plan on encouraging others when they are hit with devastating news, or even your colleagues? What music will you dance to when bad news comes your way? We hope to shed some light on how valuable life is and how our lives reflect our choices: Choose to stay focused on how your behavior, tone, and actions play a major role to all of those who work for you, with you, or even live next to you. As human beings, we all appreciate and need TLC. Spread the vibrancy of encouragement, swing to fulfilling music… And remember, beauty starts within. 

Photography by Savaza.

Written by Mavian Arocha-Rowe — August 17, 2012